圣经研读#16：反转咒诅地养育孩子 IBS#16: Reversing the Curse on Childrearing

圣经研读#16：反转咒诅地养育孩子

IBS#16: Reversing the Curse on Childrearing

1.  创世纪3:16 对养育孩子的咒诅造成什么结果？

 

2.  人堕落之后，养育孩子的主要问题是什么？ 罗马书3:23, 耶利米书17:9, 约翰一书3:4

 

3.  关于这个问题，以下经文是如何教导作父母的来反转这个咒诅？ 箴言22:6, 6:20。

 

泰德崔普在《子女心,父母情》里说基督化教养孩子，不只是教他外在的行为举止，也要揭开孩子罪恶的心思意念，才能把他引向唯一能改变人心的那位。  

 

a. 圣经吩咐孩子如何做？父母的责任是什么？以弗所书6:1, 歌罗西书 3:20-21, 出埃及记 20:12

 

 

4.  箴言25:28 说：“人不制伏自己的心﹐好像毁坏的城邑没有墙垣。”孩子在哪些事上需要学会制服？父母能如何教孩子自我控制？目的是什么？彼得后书1:5-8 。孩子失控，神会向谁追究？提摩太前书3:4-5，12。

 

 

 5.  圣经上说父母管教孩子表示什么？ 箴言 3:12, 希伯来书 12:5-11

 

 

6.  以下的这些箴言经文对接受管教的人是怎么说的？箴言3:11-12; 12:1, 13:1, 24; 15:5, 10; 19:13, 18, 26-27; 22:15; 23:13-14; 29:1,15, 17.

 

7.  管教自己的孩子怎么是向他表示爱？不管教表示了什么？

a.  敬畏在管教上的角色是什么？箴言 1:7

 

8.  因此，父母和孩子都被吩咐去对抗咒诅。基督上十架而后复活的生命之道，如何引导我们，使我们有能力？约翰福音 12:24-25 和 罗马书 6:5-14

 

父母常常不是做过头就是做不够，极少做得恰好。女人做了妈妈以后，母性的本能让她自然地把注意力都放在孩子身上，常常就忽略了丈夫。有些研究显示，如果女人跟她的丈夫没有情绪上满足的关系，她对孩子会发展成过度操控的关系，进而造成叛逆或反叛。然而，创世纪2:24 把夫妻的关系放在自己跟父母的关系之上（同样也在自己跟儿女的关系之上）。因此，顺从圣经的教导，把婚姻关系摆在前头，就能直接影响而减轻夏娃痛苦的咒诅，以及家里的冲突。

 

9.  读撒母耳记上 2-4的例子；祭司以利和他两个儿子的关系。圣经说他做父亲错在哪儿？你可以如何避免犯同样的错误？

 

进一步自己研读，在撒母耳记下13，大卫王对他儿子押沙龙，女儿他玛一塌糊涂的管教。还有始祖偏袒的结果；亚伯拉罕对以撒和以实马利，以及雅各对他的十二个儿子。

 

圣经给父母权柄管教他们的孩子。权柄的责任和个人之间的责任不同。个人之间需要爱和原谅，而权柄（就是政府、上司、头、父母）需要纠正，训练、执法。常常父母把这些不同的责任混肴了，结果只专注于培养他们自己的品格（例如耐心），付上的代价是孩子的品格（例如自我控制）。箴言上说这是恨恶自己的孩子。

不忍用杖打儿子的﹐是恨恶他。疼爱儿子的﹐随时管教。（箴言13:24)

 

Lesson 16:

IBS#16: Reversing the Curse on Childrearing

1.  What effect does the curse of Gen 3:16 have upon childrearing?

2.  What is the main problem with childrearing after the fall?  Rom 3:23, Jer 17:9, I Jn 3:4

 

3.  In light of this problem, how are parents taught in the following Scriptures to reverse this curse? Prov 22:6, 6:20,

Ted Tripp’s “Shepherding a Child’s Heart” says that Christian child rearing does not just teach rules for outward behavior, but exposes the sinful heart of a child in order to point him to the only One who can transform a sinful heart.  

 

a.  What are children commanded by Scripture to do?  What is the parent’s responsibility?  Eph 6:1, Col 3:20-21, Exo 20:12

 

4.  Prov 25:28 says, “Like a city that is broken into and without walls is a man who has no control over his spirit.”  What areas does a child need to learn to control?  How can parents teach their child to control himself?  What is the purpose of this?  2 Peter 1:5-8  Who does God hold accountable for children who are out of control? 1 Tim 3:4-5 and 12

 

 5.  What does the Bible say parental discipline of children is a sign of?  Prov 3:12, Heb 12:5-11

 

6.  What do the following Proverbs sau about a person who receives discipline?

Prov. 3:11-12; 12:1, 13:1, 24; 15:5, 10; 19:13, 18, 26-27; 22:15; 23:13-14; 29:1,15, 17.

7.  How does disciplining one’s child show him love?  What does not disciplining him show?

a.  What role does fear have in discipline?  Prov 1:7

8.  Thus both parents and children are commanded to go against the curse.  How can the path of the crucified and resurrected life of Christ guide and empower us?  Jn 12:24-25 and Romans 6:5-14

Parenting is usually overdone or underdone, rarely it is done just right.  When a woman becomes a mother, her maternal instincts naturally focus her attentions on her child, usually at the expense of her husband.  Studies have shown that if a woman does not have an emotionally satisfying relationship with her husband, she will develop a neurotic over-controlling relationship with her child, causing either rebellion or resentment.  However, Gen 2:24 puts the spousal relationship over one’s own parental (and therefore over one’s own children as well).  Thus putting priority on the marriage relationship by following Biblical commands can directly work to mitigate against Eve’s curse of pain and conflict in the home.

9.  Read about the example of Eli the priest and his relationship with his sons in 1 Sam 2-4.  What do these Scriptures say is wrong with his parenting?  How can you avoid making this same mistake?

For further self-study, study the disastrous parenting of King David with his son, Absalom, and daughter, Tamar, in 2 Sam 13, and the results of favoritism by the patriarchs: Abraham with Isaac and Ishmael, and Jacob and his 12 sons.

The Bible gives parents the authority to train up their children.  The responsibility for authority is unlike individual responsibility.  Individuals are required to love and forgive, while authorities (ie. governments, bosses, heads, parents) are required to correct, train, and execute justice.  Often parents confuse these different responsibilities and end up focusing on the nurturing of their own character (eg. patience) at the expense of their child’s (eg. self-control), which Proverbs describes as hatred for one’s child.

He who withholds his rod hates his son, but he who loves him disciplines him diligently.

(Pro13:24)