Lesson #15:
圣经研读 15 – 婚姻中的性,反转对婚姻的咒诅: 第三段 (哥林多前书第7章)
1. 根据哥林多前书7:1-5,神如何供应我们性的需要?和现在世俗的想法有何不同?
a. 为什么“男不近女倒好”?
2. “用合宜之分”,“有权柄”这些词汇听起来没有感情,也不浪漫。圣经用这些词汇形容婚姻中的性关系,是要说明什么?性生活是因为有一方觉得想要,还是一方觉得有责任满足对方的需要,这两种想法有什么差异?如果把性当成奖励会出什么问题?
3. 哥林多前书7:4 不是说“丈夫们,你们有权柄主张妻子的身子”,而是说“妻子没有权柄主张自己的身子,乃在丈夫。”两者的差别何在?可以如何应用到你的婚姻?
a. 为什么婚后一方可能对性失去兴趣?婚姻中有性生活是道命令还是个建议?他和她要如何遵从?耶稣在马太福音16:25 的话可以如何帮助我们?
4. 一方拒绝性生活对另一方会产生什么影响?有什么合适的理由可以让双方同意占时分房?你如何确保你的配偶不受撒旦的诱惑?
5. 在第6-9节,关于婚姻保罗以他的经验给了什么建议?他准许什么?为什么保罗警告那些“禁止嫁娶”的人(提摩太前书4:1-3)?
6. 藉着保罗在第10-16 节所写的,对下列的事恩主教导我们什么?
(1) 离婚
(2) 信徒和非信徒之间的离婚
(3) 离婚之后再婚
(4) 允许离婚的两种情况(哥林多前书7:15,马太福音5:32)
7. “圣化”是“分别为圣,给神使用”。信徒如何圣化还不信的配偶?
a. 信徒父母如何使孩子洁净并且圣洁?要了解神对信徒子女的看法,请看希伯来书7:1-10 ,当亚伯拉罕向麦基洗德献上十分之一,而亚伯拉罕未出世的子孙利未因在他先祖身中,也就被算为有份。那么对死了的孩子有什么影响呢?
8. 在第17-24节,保罗吩咐我们要守住各人蒙召时的身份(受割礼的,为奴的,或未婚的),不必试着改变。在第25-40节提到,父亲有特权将他未婚的女儿嫁掉。保罗给什么理由,不一定要改变当时的状况,把女儿嫁掉?而最需要改变的是什么?
9. 什么是独身的人可以做而结婚的人不能做的?
a. 为什么保罗认为寡妇不再嫁会更快乐?
10. 根据传道书4:9-12,结婚的好处是什么?在哪些方面结婚的人才能服事神?
结论 :
神赐给男人和女人婚姻,将彼此从自己的私心中赎回,治死他和她单独的自我,这种无私、合为一的过程,在婚姻的性生活有最清楚的描绘。
耶稣说:因为婚姻的结合是永久的
“那起初造人的﹐是造男造女﹐并且说﹐『因此,人要离开父母﹐与妻子连合﹐二人成为一体。』这经你们没有念过么?既然如此﹐夫妻不再是两个人﹐乃是一体的了。所以神配合的﹐人不可分开。”
(马太福音19:4-6)
甚至信徒与非信徒之间的婚姻也带来救恩,因为非信徒可以从他相信的配偶身上看到基督的作为而受益。虽然在某些情况下可以离婚,却并不是必须。基督徒饶恕和爱的品格是每个基督徒每天都需要的,特别是在婚姻里。信徒愿意遵从神对婚姻的命令,因为他/她相信神的命令是为了他/她最大的益处。
IBS #15 – Marital Sex Reverses the Curse on Marriage: Part 3 (1 Cor 7)
1. According to 1 Cor 7:1-5, what is God’s provision for our sexual needs? How is this different from contemporary thinking?
a. Why is it “good for a man not to touch a woman”?
2. The words “fulfill duty” and “have authority” sound unemotional and unromantic. What does the Bible mean by using such words to describe how each spouse should view the marital sexual relationship? What is the difference between having sex because one is in the mood, and because one feels responsible for meeting the other’s needs? What is the problem with using sex as a reward?
3. 1 Cor 7:4 does not say, “Husbands, you have authority over your wife’s body,” but instead it says, “the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does.” What is the difference? How can you apply this to your own marriage?
a. Why might a spouse lose interest in sex after marriage? Is having marital sex a command or a suggestion? How can he/she follow this? How can Jesus’ words in Matt 16:25 help us?
4. What effect does withholding sex have on the other spouse? What might be some good reasons that both spouses could agree upon for a temporary cessation? How can you guard your partner from Satan’s temptations?
5. What advice in verses 6-9 does Paul give regarding marriage from his own experience? What concession does he give? Why does Paul warn against people who “forbid marriage” (1Tim 4:1-3)?
6. What does the Lord teach through Paul in verses 10-16 about the following?
(1) divorce
(2) divorce between a believer and an unbeliever
(3) remarriage after divorce
(4) the 2 circumstances that allow for divorce (v.15 and Matt 5:32)
7. “Sanctify” means “set apart for God’s use.” How can a believing spouse sanctify the unbelieving spouse?
a. How can the children of a believing parent be clean and holy? To understand how God views the children of believers, read the account in Heb 7:1-10 of how Abraham’s act of tithing to Melchizedek was credited even to his unborn descendant Levi. What ramifications does this have for children who die?
8. In verses 17-24, Paul instructs us to remain in the condition in which we were called (as circumcised or a slave or even unmarried) and to not seek to change it. Verses 25-40 refer to a father’s prerogative to marry his virgin daughter off. What is the reason Paul gives for not seeking to change these conditions? What is most important to change?
9. What can a single person do that a married person cannot?
a. Why do you think that Paul thinks a widow is happier if she remains single?
10. What are the benefits of marriage according to Ecclesiastes 4:9-12? In what ways can married people uniquely serve God?
Summary:
God provides marriage for a man and a woman to redeem one another from one’s own selfishness, necessitating each to die to his and her single self. This selfless process of becoming one is most obviously illustrated in the marital sexual relationship.
Because of the permanence of the union of marriage, Jesus said,
“Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning MADE THEM MALE AND FEMALE, and said, ‘FOR THIS REASON A MAN SHALL LEAVE HIS FATHER AND MOTHER AND BE JOINED TO HIS WIFE, AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH’? “So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”
(Matt 19:4-6)
Marriage even between a believer and unbeliever can still be redemptive as the unbeliever can benefit from observing the life of Christ in his believing spouse. Nevertheless divorce is allowed under certain circumstances, though it is not required. The Christian traits of forgiveness and love are needed everyday in the life of every Christian, but especially in marriage. A believer can only follow the marital commands because he/she believes that God’s command has his/her best interest at heart.
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