圣经研读 #13 人在婚姻里反转咒诅 – 第一段 IBS#13 – Men Reversing The Curse in Marriage (Eph 5)

第十三课:

圣经研读  #13  人在婚姻里反转咒诅 –  第一段

IBS #13 Men Reversing the Curse in Marriage – Part 1

夏娃带来的咒诅 

 1.  复习创世纪3:16对夏娃婚姻的咒诅。咒诅中她的角色是什么？她丈夫的角色呢？

这段圣经研读要看新约如何命令丈夫和妻子，而直接违反这个咒诅的部分。这一课是关于丈夫，主要研读以弗所书5:22-33。下一课关于妻子，经文主要是彼得前书3:1-7 。

 对丈夫的诫命

 2.  以弗所书5:22-33给丈夫什么诫命，反转了创世纪3:16的咒诅？

 

希腊文的“爱”有很多不同的字，其中三个基本字的英文拼音是eros, phileo, agape 。Eros代表那种定义为爱自己的爱，情欲（erotic）就是从eros 衍生来的，而圣经没有提到这个字。情欲的爱主要关注自己对他人和凌驾他人的经验。色情就是这种爱的一个例子。  

第二种爱是phileo代表那种需要彼此相互回应，想要从接受者激起类似回应的爱。这种合约的关系，也是夫妻之间最普遍的关系。 

第三种爱是 agape，这种不带情绪的爱，在乎关爱者的品格过于被爱者的属性；因此用来表示神对人的爱，而很少用来形容人与人之间的爱。在圣经里这个字是表示慈爱或忠实的爱。奇妙的是，在以弗所书五章对丈夫要如何爱妻子的诫命，就是用的agape这个字 。

 

a.  “辖制”（创世纪3:16）和作“头”（以弗所书5:23）有何不同？

 

b.  这里用哪两个例子说明丈夫该如何爱他的妻子？丈夫要如何拿来应用？

 

3.  在26-27节，基督如何关爱教会？丈夫要如何照样关爱他的妻子？ 

 

a.  一个人如何用言语洗净另一个人？ 为什么这个诫命只给丈夫，而不给妻子？

 
4.  在歌罗西书3:19另外给丈夫什么诫命？人怎么样就能反转苦毒（以弗所书4:31-32）？

 
5.  什么是给妻子的诫命？在哪些情况下她要服从这个诫命（也参考歌罗西书3:18）？在这段主要写给丈夫，却以给妻子的诫命作总结，有什么意义？

a.  人怎么能敬重一个不值得敬重的人？丈夫怎么能去爱他不可爱的妻子？

 

6.  第31节如何说明婚姻关系超乎一个人跟父母以及跟子女的关系？在家庭里婚姻作为首要的关系有什么好处？

 

作为一个家的头，丈夫的责任有一部分是他得站在妻子和他的父母，甚至和她的父母之间。作头，他就得隔开他们给她的压力。比起对他的妻子，父母比较不会操控他。当文化和圣经相抵触，基督徒该选择哪一个？

 

7.  爱妻子如何有助于做丈夫的更信靠神？

 

结论:

神独特地分别创造了男人和女人，二者迥异，有祂的目的。祂给两者不同的身份来合作如一，带出下一代。神特别装备男人来领导，要他舍己、爱他的妻子。

虽然夏娃先吃了禁果，亚当才是要向神负责的人，而且人类的堕落也总是归咎于亚当犯罪。是夏娃被骗，带着她的丈夫悖逆而犯罪。（提摩太前书2:14）

因为人类的堕落，丈夫就不再自然地去领头、去爱；他更自然地丢开作头的身份，埋头工作或参加外面的活动。然而作为一个男人，遵守这个诫命，学着为神给他的家庭而活，他就会从一个男孩长大成为一个男人。

 

Lesson #13:

 

IBS #13 Men Reversing the Curse in Marriage – Part 1

The Curse that Eve brings

 1.  Review the curse upon Eve regarding her marriage in Gen. 3:16.  What part will she play in the curse?  What part will her husband play?

This study will examine how the NT commands to the husband and the wife directly contravene this curse.   This lesson will deal mainly with Eph 5:22-33 for the husband, while the next lesson will deal mainly with 1 Pt 3:1-7 for the wife.

 The Husband’s Commands

 2.  What is the husband commanded to do in Eph 5:22-33 that reverses the curse in Gen 3:16? 

 

There are many words for “love” in the Greek, three of the basic ones are: eros, phileo, agape.  Eros represents the kind of love that is defined as self-love, and this is where the word “erotic” comes from, and is not mentioned in the Bible.  Erotic love is mainly in concerned with one’s own experience over and above the other’s.  Pornography is an example of this kind of love.   

 The second type of love is “phileo” which represents the kind of love that is dependent upon the other’s reciprocal response, which intends to stimulate a similar response in the receiver.  This is a contractual relationship and is most common among couples. 

 The third type of love, “agape,” is an unemotional love that is more dependent upon the character of the lover than on the attributes of the beloved, and thus is used to describe the love that God has for man, and is rarely used to describe the kind of love between people.  In the Bible it is described as loving kindness or loyal love.  Amazingly, this is the word that is used in the command in Eph 5 for how husbands are to love their wives.

 

a.  What is the difference between “rule over” (Gen 3:16) and being “head” (Eph 5:23)?

 

b.  What are the two examples of how he is to love his wife?  How does a husband apply this?

 

3.  How does Christ care for the church in verses 26-27? How can a husband do the same for his wife? 

 

a.  How can a person cleanse another with the word? Why would this be a command for the husband and not the wife?

 
4.  What additional command is given to husbands is found in Col 3:19?  How can a man reverse bitterness (Eph 4:31-32)?

 
5.  What is the wife’s command?  What are the conditions for her obedience to this command (see also Col 3:18)?  What is the significance of her commands bookending this section primarily written to the husband?

a.  How can a person respect someone who doesn’t deserve it?  How can a husband love his wife if she is not lovable?

 

6.  How does verse 31 give the marriage relationship priority over one’s parents and children?  What is the benefit of the marriage relationship being the primary one in the family?

Part of a husband’s leadership in his home is for him to stand between his wife and his and her parents.  As the leader, he should shield her from their pressures.  Parents will be much more reluctant to manipulate him than the wife.  When culture and the Bible conflict, which one should a Christian choose?

 

7.  How does loving one’s wife help a husband become more dependent upon God?

 

Summary:

God created man and woman distinctly unique and different from one another for a purpose.  He assigns different roles for each to play as they work as a unit that will bring forth the next generation.  God especially equips the man to lead and requires him to love his wife sacrificially.

Although Eve ate of the forbidden fruit first, it was Adam whom God held to be responsible, and the fall of mankind is always credited to Adam’s sin.  Eve was deceived and led her husband to disobey and sin (1 Tim 2:14). 

Because of the Fall, it is unnatural for husbands to lead and love, and it will feel more natural for him to abdicate his leadership role and be consumed by work or outside activities.  Yet as a man obeys this command, he learns to live for the family God has given him, and matures from boyhood to manhood.